You stand on a distant planet
Skyline of red plateaus
Strange air and vegetation
You're a winner
Welcome to the Space Olympics
The year 3022
Take part in a grand tradition
Your name echoes in the halls of the universe
Oh... yeah, yeah
Believe in yourself
Take your game into outer space
Every single galactic athlete
Needs a coded ID badge
Drug tests are mandatory
You're a winner
The athlete's village is on Zargon
You all get a junior suite
We don't cover incidentals
So keep your ass out the mini bar
You're the best in the world
Brace yourself cuz there's no gravity
You're in the muthafuckin Space Olympics
Yeah...
Let it be known by every nation
You'll only get one meal a day
There was a bit of a budget snafu
And food funding is insufficient
We can't really enforce a curfew
As there is no light or sound
Just one of the many problems
With hosting a sporting event in space
Attention all athletes: there are minor scheduling adjustments
Space Disk - is totally cancelled
Space Swords - is totally cancelled
Space Luge - is also cancelled
And all other events are pending
Welcome to your Space Olympics
All the oxygen has run out (oh)
And someone who will not be named (yeah)
Accidentally hit self destruct
As you file to your escape pods
I'll distract the alien hoards (you're in the muthafuckin Space Olympics)
And as I stare death in the face I know my sins will take me to hell (yeah)
You do it for the love
My love
And there ain't no woman that could take your spot my love
